I do not know how most people survive weeks on vacation. Then again most people do not travel like us. See there is a modern way of transportation that has impacted the human society these past few generations. This is what you called air travel.
Unfortunately, this has not impacted nor convinced my father to use this modern form of convenient technology. No, because apparently the countless grueling hours of cussing to hysteria is far more appealing to my father than sitting in an airline seat. Oh those Wierzbicki children are so lucky. Twelve hours in just the first two days, roasting in the un-airconditioned back seat of a Buick minivan (Other known as a deteriorating boat transportation device).
Yes, the Buick Terraza. What a great designed car, made by one fine engineer. So great, that the minivan only lasted two years in production. Just check out the great review consumer reports gave it!
http://consumerguideauto.howstuffworks.com/2005-to-2007-buick-terraza.htm
But wait there are more pleasant surprises from this boat. After one climbs over the over sized middle seats (which fail to condense space when folded) to reach the back seats, gentle musky air will surround the back seats as the middle seats when folded back up crush their legs. Air conditioning continues to circulate only in the front until it decides to stop even trying. If that is not enough fun for the family, the Buick Terraza will also set its sliding doors on child lock when least expected and continue to read empty on your fuel gage, even when you just filled up the tank. And GM expects to be bailed out from the government because everyone was smart enough not to buy their vehicles. Shame on you GM. What they really need is a slap in the face.
As for transportation with the Alpha male. Everything is accounted for financially. So if the family has to deal with sitting in the car for long painful hours until their few hours walking on land collides into a strange man from Pittsburgh talking to them in the Burger King aisle, so be it. Driving gives him the control to choose where to go, although many of those choices have been lost along the way. Fear not, because the remaining bodies engulfed in the heat of the back seat can be blamed for this mishap.
And just when this "vacation" is done, I still have to deal with a twelve hour car ride home with the greatest combination of minivan and father figure. Please, if anyone is out there, For God's sake send me a one-way trip back to Chicago so I can start my summer vacation.
Monday, June 8, 2009
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
